L8r, G8r Read online

  SnowAngel:

  omg, that is so not true! i can’t believe kristin said that!

  zoegirl:

  it wasn’t in a malicious way. it was just an observation.

  SnowAngel:

  friends aren’t supposed to make “observations” like that.

  zoegirl:

  ok, time out. forget i mentioned it, all right?

  SnowAngel:

  no, it’s not all right. what she said was completely rude!

  zoegirl:

  we’re changing subjects now

  SnowAngel:

  says who?

  zoegirl:

  i passed jana in the hall, and if i’m not mistaken, she actually *smiled* at me. isn’t that bizarre? i keep expecting to find pig’s blood on my locker or something, as payback for the whole Boo Boo Bear thing, and instead she smiles at me?

  SnowAngel:

  no comment. i’m still annoyed with kristin.

  zoegirl:

  is it possible that what terri said to her—compliments of me—actually made her change her evil ways?

  SnowAngel:

  no. a spade is a spade is a spade—which AGAIN is why i’m surprised that kristin would act so uncool, cuz until now i didn’t think she WAS a spade.

  zoegirl:

  okaaaay, time to change the subject

  zoegirl:

  will you go to planned parenthood with me? i’ve called and made an appointment for tomorrow afternoon.

  SnowAngel:

  whoa *jerks back in shock* didn’t see that one coming!

  zoegirl:

  it’s just that i’m pretty sure doug and i are gonna have sex, and i’m pretty sure it’s gonna be sooner rather than later. i feel bad that i’ve made him wait this long!

  SnowAngel:

  he’s been AT SEA, zoe. not a whole lot you could do from across the ocean.

  zoegirl:

  and when we do, i don’t wanna be unprepared. i told the lady at planned parenthood that i wanna go on the pill, and she said i have to come in and talk to a counselor.

  SnowAngel:

  why the pill? why not condoms?

  zoegirl:

  well, because doug’s a virgin just like i am, so disease-wise, we’re both safe. i’ve thought about it, and the pill’s the right choice for me.

  SnowAngel:

  you could do the patch, u know. that’s what my aunt sadie uses.

  zoegirl:

  have you seen it?

  SnowAngel:

  it’s just this brown plastic-y thing. it looks like a band-aid.

  zoegirl:

  i’m gonna go with the pill.

  zoegirl:

  will you come with me?

  SnowAngel:

  of course

  SnowAngel:

  does doug know?

  zoegirl:

  no, i’m going to surprise him

  zoegirl:

  hey! you should go on the pill too, for when you and logan decide to go for it!

  SnowAngel:

  i don’t think so

  zoegirl:

  why not? don’t you want to?

  SnowAngel:

  of course i do, just … there’s no need to rush things. sometimes the wait makes it all the better.

  zoegirl:

  you’re right, you’re right, i don’t mean to pressure you. i guess i’m just so happy that i’m in love, and i want you and logan to be that happy 2. i mean, you already are, of course. you know what i’m saying.

  zoegirl:

  if only maddie would find someone!

  SnowAngel:

  is she coming to planned parenthood with us?

  zoegirl:

  no, she promised to help her brother move out of their parents’ house. can you believe mark and his girlfriend are finally getting a place of their own?

  SnowAngel:

  it’s taken long enuff

  SnowAngel:

  how’s pelt-woman doing, anyway? hairy as ever?

  zoegirl:

  hairy as ever, or so i assume. maddie still doesn’t call her by her real name, if that tells you anything.

  SnowAngel:

  do we even know her real name?

  zoegirl:

  i don’t remember. do you?

  zoegirl:

  omg, how horrible!

  SnowAngel:

  well, she probably doesn’t know our names either. we’re just “maddie’s little friends.”

  zoegirl:

  maddie’s little friends who are off to planned parenthood …

  SnowAngel:

  ppl have no idea, do they? that we’re growing up.

  zoegirl:

  but *we* know … and one of these days they’ll figure it out.

  SnowAngel:

  just hopefully not until after graduation. *wink, wink*

  Thu, Feb 9, 9:11 PM E.S.T.

  mad maddie:

  there is nothing—nothing, i tell you—worse than itchy toes.

  SnowAngel:

  except for itchy palms. HATE itchy palms.

  mad maddie:

  toes r worse. the itch is on the knuckle part, and it’s driving me nuts.

  mad maddie:

  but i actually didn’t text to tell you that. i texted to tell you about vincent. i went to his house today and found him LOOKING AT PORN ON THE INTERNET!

  SnowAngel:

  ewww!

  mad maddie:

  i strolled into his room and there it was, up on the screen. i was like, DEAR JESUS, SAVE THIS BOY!

  SnowAngel:

  what is it with guys and porn on the internet? do ALL guys like porn from the internet?

  mad maddie:

  hmm. you want the true answer, or the angela-friendly answer?

  SnowAngel:

  you don’t think logan looks at porn, do you?

  mad maddie:

  no, no, no. of course not.

  SnowAngel:

  that’s the angela-friendly answer, isn’t it?

  SnowAngel:

  oh, nvm

  SnowAngel:

  my new friend andre doesn’t look at porn on the internet, i know he doesn’t.

  mad maddie:

  what, cuz he’s gay you think that? poor innocent angela.

  mad maddie:

  and you don’t have to say “my new friend.” i go to school with andre too.

  SnowAngel:

  yeah, yeah, yeah, but i’m SURE he doesn’t look at porn. at least not the kind that vincent looks at.

  mad maddie:

  well, with vincent, it’s straight-up girl porn, and it’s just who he is. i’m like, “ya gotta love him,” u know?

  SnowAngel:

  “ya gotta love him”??? maddie, PLEASE tell me yr not doing what i think yr doing!

  mad maddie:

  which would be …?

  SnowAngel:

  crushing on vincent! falling for the bad boy!

  mad maddie:

  whoa—me, falling for VINCENT?!

  SnowAngel:

  i personally can’t believe you’re even friends with him, given that he’s so tight with jana. how do you get your head around that?

  mad maddie:

  i don’t. don’t know what the guy sees in her.

  SnowAngel:

  have you asked him?

  mad maddie:

  he says she’s fun to party with. is that a guy response or what?

  mad maddie:

  anywayz, why the inquistion? you have andre, who’s your “new friend.” i have vincent, my spanish class friend. who entertains me.

  SnowAngel:

  and makes you hot.

  mad maddie:

  give me a break. that is not true, angela! and not that it’s any of your beeswax, but he’s got a thing for lila.

  SnowAngel:

  uh, hate to say it, but it’s not like you’ve let that stop you before. chive was totally dating whitney when you guys did your little fuck-buddy thing.

 
mad maddie:

  i am so not gonna respond to that. ancient history, a.

  mad maddie:

  and “fuck buddy” is hardly the term, since i never even got naked with the guy.

  SnowAngel:

  next thing you know, it’ll be YOU jaunting off to planned parenthood, and i’ll be alone in the corner wearing black, a virgin forever.

  mad maddie:

  save the drama for yo mama. vincent and i are just buds.

  SnowAngel:

  u could look at porn together. and eat popcorn.

  mad maddie:

  and as for being a virgin forever, you’re way more likely to leave the V-club than I am—that is if things with logan are as good as you say.

  SnowAngel:

  shuddup. when and if logan and i have sex is

  mad maddie:

  yessss?

  SnowAngel:

  hold on—mary kate just texted. LOTS of !!!!s.

  mad maddie:

  dum di dum, dum di dum

  mad maddie:

  i’m practicing my typing … abcdefg

  mad maddie:

  STILL practicing my typing … hijklmnop

  SnowAngel:

  ok, now THAT was weird

  mad maddie:

  what?

  SnowAngel:

  maddie, tell me the truth. is something up with zoe? has she been saying things about me to anyone?

  mad maddie:

  what are you talking about?

  SnowAngel:

  according to mary kate, paige said zoe thinks i was FLIRTING with doug at lunch.

  SnowAngel:

  *holds out hands in bewilderment* was i flirting with doug at lunch?

  mad maddie:

  angela, you flirt with every 2-legged male on the planet.

  SnowAngel:

  but it doesn’t MEAN anything. zoe knows that.

  SnowAngel:

  do you think she seriously has a problem with me talking to doug?

  mad maddie:

  yes, she probably thinks yer trying to STEAL HER MAN

  SnowAngel:

  that’s ridiculous!

  SnowAngel:

  omg, i’m gonna txt her and see what’s going on.

  mad maddie:

  angela, i was teasing!

  mad maddie:

  angela?

  mad maddie:

  BUT MY TOES R STILL ITCHING!

  Thu, Feb 9, 9:53 PM E.S.T.

  SnowAngel:

  zo, did u talk to paige jensen at any point today?

  zoegirl:

  i sat in front of her in AP English, but i wouldn’t say we talked. why?

  SnowAngel:

  well, did u say anything to anybody that could have been passed on to paige? like to kristin, maybe?

  zoegirl:

  could you be a little more specific?

  SnowAngel:

  ok, this is stupid, but i’m just gonna say it. i know you think i was hogging doug’s attention today, but do you honestly think i was FLIRTING with him?

  SnowAngel:

  cuz that was a LONG time ago when i somewhat (sorta) threw myself at him, and anyway i would never flirt with him cuz he’s going out with YOU, which i would hope you would know!

  zoegirl:

  what? i *do* know that. when did i say you were flirting with him?!

  SnowAngel:

  and the more i think about it, the more it makes me mad. i don’t wanna go around worrying about every last thing i say or do around him, so if you have a problem with the way i’m acting, would you plz just tell me instead of talking about me behind my back?

  zoegirl:

  angela. STOP.

  zoegirl:

  did paige say i was talking about you behind your back?

  SnowAngel:

  mary kate overheard paige talking to some junior, and paige said that you said i was embarrassing myself with doug, and that i needed to keep my hormones to myself!

  zoegirl:

  ???

  zoegirl:

  i never said ANY of that!

  SnowAngel:

  r u sure?

  zoegirl:

  angela, i just 6 hours ago asked you as my dear friend to go to planned parenthood with me so that one day doug and i can have sex. would i do that if i thought you were flirting with him?

  SnowAngel:

  well, what about kristin? after all, she already told you what a harlot i am!

  zoegirl:

  kristin made *one comment* about how much you talked to him. i shouldn’t have even told you.

  SnowAngel:

  what else aren’t you telling me?

  zoegirl:

  nothing!

  zoegirl:

  *do* you still have a thing for him?

  SnowAngel:

  NO!

  SnowAngel:

  but if you didn’t say any of the things paige says you did …

  SnowAngel:

  i’m confused. why would paige say you did?

  zoegirl:

  i have no idea. call her and ask.

  SnowAngel:

  yeah right. i’ve never even had a class with her. i’m gonna call her up and be like, “oh, btw, why were u talking trash about me?”

  zoegirl:

  then call mary kate and ask *her*. or call kristin. somebody is obviously mixed up.

  zoegirl:

  seriously, angela, i’m a little hurt you would think that of me!

  SnowAngel:

  well I’M a little hurt YOU would think that of ME!

  zoegirl:

  but i didn’t! i *don’t*!!!

  zoegirl:

  listen, i think we better end this convo, ok?!

  SnowAngel:

  zoe, wait!

  zoegirl:

  why, so you can yell at me some more?

  SnowAngel:

  agh. i’m SORRY. i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry!

  SnowAngel:

  zo?

  zoegirl:

  i’m here. i just don’t know where this even came from.

  SnowAngel:

  mary kate thought i should know, that’s all.

  zoegirl:

  except there’s nothing TO know. you’re getting worked up over nothing.

  zoegirl:

  remember last semester when you made brownies to cheer me up, after my mom got mad at me for missing the early decision deadline for princeton? only i didn’t *know* that’s why you’d made them, and i didn’t eat any, and you got really pissed?

  SnowAngel:

  i used aunt sadie’s french chocolate. they were the most delicious brownies ever.

  zoegirl:

  you told me to tell you the next time you overreacted about something. well, here i am telling you.

  SnowAngel:

  ok, ok, ok

  zoegirl:

  you need to have faith in me. i love you, and i would never talk about you behind your back. all right?

  SnowAngel:

  except u did—with kristin

  zoegirl:

  ANGELA!

  SnowAngel:

  *baby deep breath. mama deep breath. big daddy deep breath*

  zoegirl:

  um … is this some new kind of therapy?

  SnowAngel:

  yes, i learned it from aunt sadie, who got it from 1 of her friends who teaches pre-school.

  zoegirl:

  and did it work? do you maybe want to tell me that you love me too?

  SnowAngel:

  of COURSE i do. and i’m sorry for freaking. i am.

  SnowAngel:

  *blinks humbly at friend* are we still on for tomorrow?

  zoegirl:

  we better be!

  Thu, Feb 9, 10:20 PM E.S.T.

  SnowAngel:

  hey mads. zoe denied it all, but i called mary kate and she’s SURE that’s what she heard.

  SnowAngel:

  u don’t think zoe’s lying, do u?

  mad maddie:
r />   i’ve never known zoe to be a liar

  SnowAngel:

  yeah-huh. she lied to her mom when she said she’d apply to princeton early decision, when she never planned to actually do it.

  mad maddie:

  that was zoe being passive-aggressive, not outright lying. and she DID get her application in eventually.

  SnowAngel:

  well, maybe it’s the same thing here. maybe she said something about me in a passive-aggressive sort of way, and it got twisted around.